my life sucks.. yesterday and today weren't good days.
anyways,today had no mood. a big thanks to those who cheered me up today! noraza,rahziah,rusydi and hanafi actually..for listening to me.. thanks rusydi,you made me open up but i couldn't control my emotions..
imma tell the truth here.
because of what you told me,i feel like a nobody now. i wonder how others will think of me now when they see u have commented such things about me. you don't want me to be happy in life?
why facebook? couldn't you have talked to me?
anyways, about my motivator.. noraza,its not working... it didnt work..i sent that message cause i just dont want my sis to think i'm despo. besides,i still have a crush on him.. nothing wrong for a girl to have a crush.. and he'll always be our motivator kays:)
if heartbroken means sitting on the bathroom floor,crying your lungs out and regretting what you did.. then i guess i just had another session of heartbreak..
i had huge,high hopes.. that at least a friendship could blossom.. but no,i was so wrong.. i dropped the fucking world on my head. i mean come on, a handsome face falling for a eff-face like me.. please uh, he gotta be blind to fall for me..
so,currently texting shiva and facebooking and eating... no mood to study..
and yeah, there might actually be someone else... well, i cant say anything else,i dont know him yet.. we're just friends.. but i'm very sure if there's more to this friendship, there might very well be another arguement proving her right... saying that "if its not this guy, its another.. if its not another, its someone else"
and after all you said, i dont think the apology helped me gain back my confidence.. am i supposed to face the world when people now think that i am a despo? i am a minah? i have a fucked up attitude? i am a small punk? i am a bitch with a bitchy attitude because i wear short skirts?
let me clarify this ok!
if i do tie my hair like my mom,its my hair,please dont bother.. and if that hairstyle seems minah to you,thats your problem.. seriously.i like my hair the way it is.
i have a attitude problem yeah? well, tell me one person in the world who wont give attitude to another person who insulted them for nothing? you talk as if you've never shwon me attitude before.. i can tell you at least 10 times you showed me attitude when it wasnt even my fault.. and now,i'm bringing the family name down right?
i'm a small punk.. coz i pierce my ear 2 times right? my other friends have 8 piercings..they're not punk.. i'm sure your friends have piercings too,they arent punk.. and i rebond my fringe? the first two times was without permission but later dad allowed me to do so.. so there is not problem with that now.
i'm also a bitch? coz i wear short skirts... yeah then, come to school with me one day,i won't fold my skirt once. i'll just let it fall down ok... please uh..the skirt size 27.. my waist size 24.. big difference right... it becomes shorter as i fold,common sense.. and i only fold once.its only necessary to fold ONCE!if it seems like a short skirt, i cant do anything about it.
best part, i'm despo... you think i find boyfriends because i'm a playgirl?? its absolutely normal for a girl to have a crush on a guy... and please, i dont move on that fast ok... and you know that... now its been 6 months and i finally had a crush on someone else.. just a crush.. and you insulted me so much that i don't wanna get to know him anymore... well then, thinking of it now,i guess it was more of a liking than a crush... coz i cried,i dont know why,but i did. i felt that i missed a chance....anyways, to hell with that..
as long as my friends know i'm not such a person, i'm fine with that.. coz now,i'm starting to have the same mindset as when i was in sec 2... my friends are a better family than my real family
-my eyes are swelling up.. dont let this happen again...
--i've lost almost all my hope.. dear noraza,can i do that stupid thing again... the one we both used to do?
P.S [ i'm not totally angry at you. i still have that slight hatred and i dont know when i'll start talking to you again.. but for now,it's not gonna happen quickly.. and another thing, its the first time in sec school i'm having a camp..humanities camp.. it falls on your birthday.. from 730-1.30 i guess.. i dont wanna go... i've got plans for you... but if its compulsory,i'll make sure my plans are still carried out. it'll take time for me to start talking to you again,like we used to. ]
and to someone who probably doesn't even visit this blog: i dont know whats happening now. i just want things to get back to normal..
anyways,today had no mood. a big thanks to those who cheered me up today! noraza,rahziah,rusydi and hanafi actually..for listening to me.. thanks rusydi,you made me open up but i couldn't control my emotions..
imma tell the truth here.
because of what you told me,i feel like a nobody now. i wonder how others will think of me now when they see u have commented such things about me. you don't want me to be happy in life?
why facebook? couldn't you have talked to me?
anyways, about my motivator.. noraza,its not working... it didnt work..i sent that message cause i just dont want my sis to think i'm despo. besides,i still have a crush on him.. nothing wrong for a girl to have a crush.. and he'll always be our motivator kays:)
if heartbroken means sitting on the bathroom floor,crying your lungs out and regretting what you did.. then i guess i just had another session of heartbreak..
i had huge,high hopes.. that at least a friendship could blossom.. but no,i was so wrong.. i dropped the fucking world on my head. i mean come on, a handsome face falling for a eff-face like me.. please uh, he gotta be blind to fall for me..
so,currently texting shiva and facebooking and eating... no mood to study..
and yeah, there might actually be someone else... well, i cant say anything else,i dont know him yet.. we're just friends.. but i'm very sure if there's more to this friendship, there might very well be another arguement proving her right... saying that "if its not this guy, its another.. if its not another, its someone else"
and after all you said, i dont think the apology helped me gain back my confidence.. am i supposed to face the world when people now think that i am a despo? i am a minah? i have a fucked up attitude? i am a small punk? i am a bitch with a bitchy attitude because i wear short skirts?
let me clarify this ok!
if i do tie my hair like my mom,its my hair,please dont bother.. and if that hairstyle seems minah to you,thats your problem.. seriously.i like my hair the way it is.
i have a attitude problem yeah? well, tell me one person in the world who wont give attitude to another person who insulted them for nothing? you talk as if you've never shwon me attitude before.. i can tell you at least 10 times you showed me attitude when it wasnt even my fault.. and now,i'm bringing the family name down right?
i'm a small punk.. coz i pierce my ear 2 times right? my other friends have 8 piercings..they're not punk.. i'm sure your friends have piercings too,they arent punk.. and i rebond my fringe? the first two times was without permission but later dad allowed me to do so.. so there is not problem with that now.
i'm also a bitch? coz i wear short skirts... yeah then, come to school with me one day,i won't fold my skirt once. i'll just let it fall down ok... please uh..the skirt size 27.. my waist size 24.. big difference right... it becomes shorter as i fold,common sense.. and i only fold once.its only necessary to fold ONCE!if it seems like a short skirt, i cant do anything about it.
best part, i'm despo... you think i find boyfriends because i'm a playgirl?? its absolutely normal for a girl to have a crush on a guy... and please, i dont move on that fast ok... and you know that... now its been 6 months and i finally had a crush on someone else.. just a crush.. and you insulted me so much that i don't wanna get to know him anymore... well then, thinking of it now,i guess it was more of a liking than a crush... coz i cried,i dont know why,but i did. i felt that i missed a chance....anyways, to hell with that..
as long as my friends know i'm not such a person, i'm fine with that.. coz now,i'm starting to have the same mindset as when i was in sec 2... my friends are a better family than my real family
-my eyes are swelling up.. dont let this happen again...
--i've lost almost all my hope.. dear noraza,can i do that stupid thing again... the one we both used to do?
P.S [ i'm not totally angry at you. i still have that slight hatred and i dont know when i'll start talking to you again.. but for now,it's not gonna happen quickly.. and another thing, its the first time in sec school i'm having a camp..humanities camp.. it falls on your birthday.. from 730-1.30 i guess.. i dont wanna go... i've got plans for you... but if its compulsory,i'll make sure my plans are still carried out. it'll take time for me to start talking to you again,like we used to. ]
and to someone who probably doesn't even visit this blog: i dont know whats happening now. i just want things to get back to normal..